Excruciating Mental Pain.

I haven’t posted in some time which I apologise to those of you who follow. Thank you it means a lot that you are interested in my Journey.  Over the past couple of weeks I have had a bad time with hospitalisation and severe mental breakdown. Everyday living with the mental torture of when the…

Painful Week

Sorry I haven’t posted in a while. As you know I have been reducing the steriods to the point now that I no longer take them. I don’t know if the steriods where helping with pain but this past week or two I have been in agony.  My back, hips and ribs are so painful…

Worrying (Part 2)

Earlier in the week I told you about ending up in eye casualty regarding flashing light in my left eye. I was very quickly referred to the consultant. I seen him on Thursday. He explained that when the tumours where found last year there was a lot of fluid in my retina.  This time there…

Fatherly Love

  Words from my Heart Cancer is not stronger than fatherly love Cancer will not separate me from fatherly love Cancer is evil fatherhood is pure and precious Cancer may want to damage my relationship with my kids but will never prevail Cancer will beat me up, damage my brain, make me angry, weaken my…

Worrying

Yesterday I ended up in eye casualty in the Royal Victoria Hospital. The past week I have been getting a flashing light in my left eye and headaches. I went through various scans and ultrasound to identify why this was happening. Originally when the tumours where found in my brain they where found through this…

I’m Back!

I had a lovely time in Spain with my family. By day the weather was blue sky and around 20 degrees and at night it was cold. It felt like a really good Northern Ireland summer.  I managed to walk everyday and cycled one day. I was surprised how well I coped, although my hips…

Excited

Im off to Spain tomorrow for 5 days😎🌞🍌🍏. After having good news I think I deserve a break. I know it will probably exhaust me, but you know what I don’t care. I need to enjoy myself I need to enjoy life from now on!!  Anyway I will try and post when Spain 🇪🇸 

Hope for the future 

Today I travelled to the city hospital. My appointment to see my consultant was 9.30am I left the house at 8.30am to allow time to get there on time due to rush hour traffic. As I sat in the car and travelled to the hospital all I could think off was the result of my…

Big Day

Tomorrow will be a big day for me as I get the results of my recent CT Scan. I’m a nervous wreak and really do pray that the cancer as either remained the same”stable” or has got better, tomorrow will tell.  To help me through this , Action Cancer gave me some complimentary therapy. It’s…

CT Scan

Well today it’s back to reality, after having a great weekend with my sons swimming I’m now sitting in the hospital waiting to have my routine CT Scan.  I have to sit here for around an hour and drink a fluid which contains a dye that allows the scanner to show up any tumours. As…

Proud Dad

In amongst the nightmare of cancer comes a bright light. Having children is the proudest most awesome time you can have. This weekend one of my sons made me very proud.  He has a passion for swimming and swims for the national team and this weekend he achieved the qualification times for the Youth Commenwealth…

Anxiety and Cancer

 Ever since I was first diagnosed I have suffered from anxiety. It’s a feeling deep in your stomach which you don’t feel in control off and this feeling can then increase your mental worry and thoughts. It can also make you shake and panic in whatever environment you are in. When I feel anxious…